The Historama: The Blog of the Fawcett Universe

Curse of SHAZAM

By Cynthia Finnegan on December 24, 2011 in Comics, DC, Other Venues, Recent Comics, Shazam!

Warren Ellis’ “Harry Potter/Dumbledore on crack” version of Captain Marvel is finally seeing the light of day … only he’s going to be called “Shazam” instead of Captain Marvel, and it’s not being written Ellis.

It’s being written by Geoff “why should I come up with my own ideas when I can steal someone else’s” Johns and drawn by Gary “Can’t draw a kid if my life depended on it or an adult who doesn’t look like a psychotic, constipated baboon” Frank.

The reason for the name change? Well, other than pure stupidity, Johns claims that the general, non-comic reading populace only knows Cap as “Shazam”, which is inaccurate. Most non-comic readers would think that Cap was the Flash.

The iconic old wizard is gone replaced by a character who looks, as Ellis put it, Dumbledore on crack, right down to missing teeth and open sores. The iconic Billy Batson is gone, too, replaced by a sad, 30-something-looking Harry Potter clone, right down to the glasses and the Hogwarts school uniform. All he’s missing is the scar, which will probably show up after he first says the magic word.

Geoff Johns is a plagiaristic hack, and J.K. Rowling should sue him, DC and Warner Entertainment. There, I finally said it. Happy now?

And some people wonder why I want to buy the Fawcetts? I can’t fuck them up any worse than they already have been, and I know I can do a damn sight better without stealing other crackheaded so-called writer’s hack “ideas” that were stolen from the Harry Potter novels.

This is gonna wind up in this year’s “Biggest WTFs” list.

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Captain Marvel Trademark

By Cynthia Finnegan on December 24, 2011 in Comics, Gundam Wing, Mar-Vell, Marvel Comics

Found this interesting, if somewhat inaccurate, tidbit on the DC Message Boards

Marvel “has” the Captain Marvel name. They have had it since 1967.

Actually, the trademark on the Kree Warrior version may have been applied for in ’67, but it didn’t go into effect until June 9th, 1970, according to the US Patent and Trademark Office.

By the way, that trademark was “killed” in the early 1990s.

Marvel never reapplied for THAT character, nor do they actually have a trademark on their current version. Their FORMER parent company, Cadence Entertainment, has two trademarks for A character called “Captain Marvel”, one for a vocal performance and the other for publication, but it’s NOT for Mar-Vell.

Don’t believe it? Check this out:

http://tess2.uspto.gov/bin/gate.exe?f=searchss&state=4002:partsf.1.1

Just type in the words “Captain Marvel” and click the “Search” button.

That’s a link to Mar-Vell’s entry in TESS, the search engine for the US Patent and Trademark Office.

Note: I would have posted this on the DCMBs themselves, but like I’ve said, I’ve been permanently banned from them for trying to give DC fans accurate information and trying to defuse trolls with humor.

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RIP Jerry Robinson, creator of the Joker and Robin

By Cynthia Finnegan on December 8, 2011 in DC, Other Characters

We at the Fawcett Universe would like to extend our sincerest condolences to the family of premiere Batman artist Jerry Robinson, who passed away at 89 years young.

You can find more information on Jerry’s life and contributions to the industry here: R.I.P. Jerry Robinson

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World’s Mightiest Mortals/Gundam Wing pics

By Cynthia Finnegan on October 14, 2011 in Fawcett, Gundam Wing, Manga, Marvel Family

Over the next few days, I’ll be scanning some new artwork for upload on to my deviantART account, including some World’s Mightiest Mortals/Gundam Wing crossover pics that will be titled thus:

The Leaders: Billy Batson and Hiiro Yui. That should be obvious.

The Gods of Death and Thunder: Duo Maxwell and Freddy Freeman (my version of Freddy is a quarter Japanese on his late mother’s side and a hacker of some skill; Narukami (God of Thunder, literally) is Freddy’s handle as a hacker.) Duo refers to himself as Shinigami, the God of Death, and is also a hacker of some skill.

The Silent Observers: Trowa Barton/Triton Bloom and Hillary Batson. Hillary, or Hill for short, is my version of Billy and Mary’s second cousin. She’s the nicest blonde Goth you’ll ever meet, and she has Shazam powers, herself. Triton Bloom is Trowa’s birth name.

The Kindly Ones: Mary Batson and Quatre Raberba Winner. Both come from wealth and privilege, but haven’t allowed it to kill their kindness or basic decency.

The Warriors for Justice: Zhang Wu Fei and “Phat” Billy Batson (NOT related to Billy or Mary, just a kid who’s ancestor “adopted” the name after one of “our” Billy’s helped him escape the pre-Civil War South). Pretty self-explanatory.

The Wild Cards: Billy Tallhorse Batson (again, not related, but a boy who’s ancestors were helped by one of “real” Billy’s) and Milliardo Peacecraft/Zechs Marquise. Again, pretty self explanatory. Milliardo Peacecraft is Zechs Marquise’s real name, and he is the elder brother to Relena Peacecraft.

Some commentary would be nice.

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Flashpoint # 5: S!H!A!Z!A!M! Spoilers

By Cynthia Finnegan on August 31, 2011 in Comics, DC, Other Characters, Recent Comics, Shazam!

I just want to say that, as a whole, Flashpoint was exactly what I’ve come to expect from anything written by Geoff Johns; all foreplay and no orgasm, and # 5 had a lot of mischaracterizations and shit that defies even Gallifreian laws of quantum physics, leaving one not well-versed in the DCU wondering “What the f**k?”.

And the characters who are supposed to replace the REAL Marvel Family in the DCnU? They appear in all of seven panels, Billy was still DEAD, Mary was still screaming for her brother like a hysterical twit, and Freddy, Eugene, Darla, and Pedro were useless even as wallpaper.

(In case you were wondering where I got the information on Johns’ Captain Thunder being “The SHAZAM hero of the New DC, because the fans demanded it!”, it was from DC’s own blog, in a post published on July 12th, 2011, and deleted on July 15th, 2011 because it “revealed too much information”)

I may not be remembering right, but the Mary I grew up reading, had she ever witnessed her brother being murdered, would have let rage take over, grabbed the nearest heavy and/or sharp object, and started swinging at Amazon midsections.

And Freddy had two perfectly good weapons in his hands (yes, I mean his canes), so why wasn’t he using them to get a little justice for his fallen friend? The Freddy I knew as a kid used his single crutch to beat back a gang of Nazis trying to cave his face in, for crissakes.

I expected the other three (four, if you count Tawny) to be useless appendages, so no disappointment there. Thomas Wayne’s death at the “hands” of the Enchantress? No big surprise there, either.

But the biggest WTF honor goes to the sequence where the Flashpoint version of the Flash, Barry Allen, find out that all this was his fault, races into the “speed force”, finds the younger version of himself trying to save his mother, and then literally begins to beat himself up.

Time paradox, anyone?

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